Parkin' My Hyde at Speaker's Corner

I don't understand racism. There is not a cell in my body that gets it. Yet, for some reason, we are surrounded by it. How, in a country that is of mixed race, creed and prides itself with freedom, can anyone claim to be superior to anyone else?

Growing up we were never really exposed to it. My mom is of Japanese/Hawaiian/Native American decent, my dad is English (although for some reason, he thinks he is German even though our genealogy documentation traces back to England, but, you know, whatever- he's dad, right?). My grandmother was born and raised in Hawaii and spoke Hawaiian, Japanese and English (known as "pidgin"). When she first moved stateside after WWII, a man in a truck ran her over (she survived but was injured) while yelling a profane slang word for Japanese at her. I was in my late teens before I knew this happened. In the early 1970's, not too long after the Civil Rights Act of 1968 involving equal housing, an African American family moved into our suburban neighborhood. My mom immediately welcomed the family into the neighborhood, and became fast friends with them. My parents hired their teenage daughters to babysit us one summer. Honestly, it never occurred to my sister and I that we were of a "different race", to us, they were cool teenage girls that were fun to hang out with.

The first time I ever encountered racism was in junior high. A girl at my school (we went to a small private school) told me that if I hugged my African American friend, that her color would rub off on me. Even then, I knew this was absurd. I stopped being friends with the racist girl because I didn't like associating with ignorance. I remember once a relative called someone "colored" and my dad asked them, "Oh, yeah, what color?", I immediately pictured green. Once in Jr. High, one of my teachers made an off hand remark about me being "yellow" because I was part Japanese. I had no idea what this meant yet was still offended and saddened by it. My mom straightened him out, be afraid, be very afraid... I don't think I was raised sheltered by any means, yet I cannot explain my lack of knowledge when it came to racism. When I was 18 I moved in with my African American boyfriend and didn't give it another thought. I liked him, he liked me - end of story, right? Little did I know that almost a year and a half later, we would break up due to the racism his mother felt for him living with a "white" girl. I remembered thinking, "Wait, I'm not white!" and mourning the loss of what was and could have been.

This is why when I recently encountered racism to the point of bigotry at a family gathering I was appalled, saddened and disappointed. My daughter recently came out and wanted to bring her girlfriend to a family function. I didn't give it a second thought- of course she can come! The other cousins bring their boyfriends so what is the difference? When my daughter walked in with her girlfriend and said hello to the family, one member was silent. This is a relative that has always been close to my daughter and on this day, he wouldn't even turn his head to say hi. Everyone else treated them like the family that they are, but he refused to man-up, swallow his pride and simply say hi. Now, I know everyone is entitled to their opinions, beliefs, etc., but no one is entitled to view another as a lower human. When my daughter came out I was proud of her. To know this about herself at such a young age, and be bold enough to stand on the truth of who she is - Oh yeah, I am proud. So, who the hell does he think he is to attempt to make my daughter feel bad about herself? I asked her after we left if he made her feel bad in any way. She said no, she just felt sad for him. The lessons I have strived to teach her that we should never give another the power to control the way we feel sunk in. Hurray! Again, I am proud. However, I am also sad. Sad for my relative, sad for this country. We have come so far, yet have so far to go.

It seems like this generation of kids, currently in high school, is more accepting and tolerant of others. Maybe this means that in our not so distant future, racism won't be such an issue in America. I hope so. I hope my grandchildren never have to encounter any form of racism or bigotry. They can be free to pursue happiness in peace and harmony. As Lennon said, "Imagine" that. Meanwhile, I still don't understand racism. I don't understand why we still need to go around Mt. Sinai yet one more time when the promised land is just a few days away.

Why can't we all just get along?